PLEASE HELP WITH CORRECTIONS VERY HARD SENTENCES

Question

Could you tell me whether my corrections are correct and if not if you could correct them?

- Dark shoes stay nicer than white shoes longer. OK
- Apart from/other than the signing of the contract, you guys have the same jobs. BOTH
- This book sells (the) best. OK OPTIONAL
- Ask them to pay for it, that way we'll know if they are going to come. OK
- I don't want my pants to get wet/getting wet. TO GET is BETTER
- Water seems so much colder if drunk right after you've had menthol flavoured gum. OK
- How many carats is the ring/is on the ring? FIRST
- My ring has 10 times less carats/1/10 as many carats as yours. NOT SURE
- If you take the discount into account, its within the price range./If you count the discount... NOT SURE
- Who was married (the) longest? BOTH
- How long will I /do I have to wait? BOTH
- Even if I wouldn't want it done to me, I don't mind doing it to others. OK
- Could you not talk to her while she's working so/that way we can leave soon? NOT SURE
- She works her contacts, that way when she needs something, she can get it for free.
- How many days before do I have to apply the cream (in order) for it not to look bad.
- We drove along/alongside the river. BOTH
- What could I have done with my arms for my chest to hurt as badly as it does. OK

Doctor D · Accepted Answer

Here are my suggestions (and questions for you).

- Dark shoes stay nicer than white shoes longer. OK (No, reword:)

Dark shoes stay nice longer than white shoes.

- Apart from/other than the signing of the contract, you guys have the same jobs. BOTH
Yes, "apart from/other than" are equally good. But the basic sentence needs work. For example, you should say "have the same job" (not "jobs") or "your jobs are the same."

- This book sells (the) best. OK OPTIONAL

- Ask them to pay for it, that way we'll know if they are going to come. OK
I would make this two sentences: Ask them to pay for it. That way..."

- I don't want my pants to get wet/getting wet. TO GET is BETTER

- Water seems so much colder if drunk right after you've had menthol flavoured gum. OK

- How many carats is the ring/is on the ring? FIRST

- My ring has 10 times less carats/1/10 as many carats as yours. NOT SURE
My ring has one-tenth as many carats as yours. (However, this seems unlikely. If one ring is twenty carat gold, then your ring would be two carat gold, which I doubt anyone makes.)

- If you take the discount into account, its within the price range./If you count the discount... NOT SURE
Either is correct, but both are awkward. I would say: If you include the discount, it's within the price range.

- Who was married (the) longest? BOTH

- How long will I /do I have to wait? BOTH

- Even if I wouldn't want it done to me, I don't mind doing it to others. OK
To improve the logic (contrast), I would say "Even though I ... "

- Could you not talk to her while she's working so/that way we can leave soon? NOT SURE
In this sentence, I would use "so."

- She works her contacts, that way when she needs something, she can get it for free.
Again, two sentences. "She works her contacts. That way..." Or else, use a different form: "She works her contacts so that when...."

- How many days before do I have to apply the cream (in order) for it not to look bad.
Using "before" confuses the meaning. Do you mean simply: For how many days must I apply the cream in order for it to look good? Or do you mean: How many days beforehand must I apply the cream in order for it to look good (at a certain time)? Also to what does "it" refer?

- We drove along/alongside the river. BOTH

- What could I have done with my arms for my chest to hurt as badly as it does. OK
Maybe. The meaning is unclear. Why are we talking about the arms? Why cannot you just say: What could I have done for my chest to hurt as badly as it does?

I hope this helps.

Alc24 · Answer

THANK YOU SOOOOOOO MUCH DOCTOR D.

PLEASE HELP WITH CORRECTIONS VERY HARD SENTENCES

Top answer

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬