Please correct this

Question

Hi group,Please correct these sentences below.(This is a part of a telephone conversation bewteen me and a customer rep. from company xxy)Hi good morning, I'd like to check with you on your cost saving phone system that we've been using for quite sometime now. This morning one of our clients wanted some information regarding a misunderstanding that transpired between their customer representative and our sales representative somewhere in Jan 06. So I called your cost saving phone system to retrieve this particular telephone conversation (recorded) but I couldn't get it becuase according to the system it only stores information for three months after that the system overrides it. Could you help me on this?Thank you.Regards,Jeeva

Clive · Accepted Answer

Hi,

Please correct these sentences below.

(This is a part of a telephone conversation between me and a customer rep. from company ***)

Hi, good morning. I'd like to check with you about your cost saving phone system that we've been using for quite sometime now.

This morning one of our clients wanted some information regarding a misunderstanding that transpired between their customer representative and our sales representative sometime in Jan 06. So I called your cost-saving phone system to retrieve this particular telephone conversation (recorded) but I couldn't get it because according to the system it only stores information for three months and after that the system overrides it. Could you help me on this?

This is OK. Speech like this is seldom perfect, in terms of grammar. I've just suggested a very few changes. Instead of Could you help me on this?, I suggest that you could be more specific about what kind of help you want. eg Is there any way that you can help me to retrieve this conversation?

Best wishes, Clive

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