Chibi Posted 19 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
Hi, beloved members
Followed is an emotional writing and I really need someone to proofread it. Thanks!
I love you not because you are excellent. I love you because you are you yourself. The poem I wrote for you might not be perfect but it came from the bottom of my heart. I really want to send it to you. Sadly, now I am grown up to realize that I have been too dependent on you. I have believed all that you have said. I have been happy whenever I hear from you. Actually, your promises have just been for the sake of promises. You have told such things to many other people, not just to me. I have known that you are of the entire world, not mine. However, when I realized that your promises were not meaningful as I had thought I still felt a bit disappointed. Today, I have kept waiting, waiting for a reply. Perhaps, the reply would show me that some promise was true, but till now nothing has come … Anyway, good luck to you, my once angel!
I love you not because you are excellent. I love you because you are you yourself. The poem I wrote for you might not be perfect but it came from the bottom of my heart. I really want to send it to you. Sadly, now I am grown up to realize that I have been too dependent on you. I have believed all that you have said. I have been happy whenever I hear from you. Actually, your promises have just been for the sake of promises. You have told such things to many other people, not just to me. I have known that you are of the entire world, not mine. However, when I realized that your promises were not meaningful as I had thought I still felt a bit disappointed. Today, I have kept waiting, waiting for a reply. Perhaps, the reply would show me that some promise was true, but till now nothing has come … Anyway, good luck to you, my once angel!
Top answer
uhmmm, do you expect the recipient to reply to this?
Get the Weekly English Kit 📬
New words, one handy idiom, and a 2-minute quiz — delivered to your inbox to keep your streak alive.
0
0
Hi,
Actually, I am learning English and wanna improve my expression in any kind of writing. So I want someone to comment on this in terms of using the language, not in terms of content or emotion. Could you please help me?
Actually, I am learning English and wanna improve my expression in any kind of writing. So I want someone to comment on this in terms of using the language, not in terms of content or emotion. Could you please help me?
00
Highlighted some things you need to fix.
ChibiI love you not because you are excellent,. I love youbut because you areyouyourself. The poem I wrote for you might not be perfect but it came from the bottom of my heart. I really want to send it to you. Sadly, now Iam grown up torealize that I have been too depe
00
Thank you, Julielai. It will help me much to improve my writing. One thing to ask, I don't understand why you said "awkward" after highlighting the phrase "once angel"
Best wishes,
Best wishes,
00
Just thought it was a bit awkward there. I think a nice goodbye will suffice.
0