Had come vs came

Question

An editor recently made the following changes to my work:

Then she ~~came~~ had come here, masterminded a revolt, and the surviving peasants rewarded her with the keys to the city.

It would seem to me that either of these are correct:

Then she came here, masterminded a revolt, and the surviving peasants rewarded her with the keys to the city.

Then she had come here, masterminded a revolt, and the surviving peasants rewarded her with the keys to the city.

It seems like "had come" is clumsier and more wordy then came - so I'm trying to figure out why such a change would be made - Any insights? Is one of these wrong? Are both acceptable?

Thanks

BarbaraPA · Accepted Answer

Hi,
Actually, I would do it as such:
Then she came here and masterminded a revolt, and the surviving peasants rewarded her with the keys to the city.

She is the subject of the first part of the sentence and so her two verbs should be linked with an "and" and not a comma. The second part of the sentence has a new subject.

There's no reason for the "had come," which doesn't work well with the "Then." If she has a past perfect, she needs a simple past to follow in a new clause, not simple past stuck on to the same one.

You could do this: She had come to the city and had masterminded a revolt and was rewarded by the remaining peasants with the keys to the city.

Had come vs came

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