Could you please check the below for errors

Question

I am a graduate in Electronics who has 6+ years of experience in IT support field with strong analytics, problem solving and customer service skills.I am seeking a job in the field of system Administrator/ Network Administrator/Help Desk Technical Support. I have 3 year experience in the same field in the home country and 3+ years in the Middle East.
I am now working as an IT support Engineer in a multinational company in UAE and like to change the job as the contract with my current employer is going to finish on March 2012, so I am fully available to join for a new job in the middle of March onwards.I believe that I am a very sincere to my profession and responsible hardworking personnel who like to do a job assigned in a professional manner with utmost sincerity and commitment.
I am looking forward to hear from you

2186 · Accepted Answer

u can apply in fino company,

Dimsumexpress · Answer

subash2008I am a graduate of XYZ university with a major in Electronics. I have also worked ~~who has~~ in the IT support filed for over 6 years. ~~of experience in IT support field~~ I have strong analytical, problem solving, and customer service skills. I am seeking for a position ~~a job~~ in the field of System Administrator/ Network Administrator/Help Desk Technical Support. ~~I have 3 year experience in the same field in the home country and 3+ years in the Middle East~~. ( Are these the 6 plus years you referred to? , or additional? You need to organize your qualifications and experiences so that your resume is clear) I am currently working for, ABC, a multinational company in UAE, as a contract IT Support Engineer. I would like to apply for the ( X ) position as my contract with the current employer is going to end in March 2012. I hope my qualifications can match your requirements. I consider myself a highly professional and hardworking individual. I am looking forward to hearing from you

Subash,
If this is a real CV, there were few problems as far as making an impression is concerned, I understood what you tried to say. But in a professional environment, a hiring manager is going to pick on every small details. So the thought organization and sentence structures have to come together to make an impression. I revised what I read based on my perception and hope that gives you a cleaner starting point to work with. The crossed out parts are not necessarily wrong but they were awkwardly constructed. Good luck!

Could you please check the below for errors

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