Sailsofoblivion Posted 12 years ago
Grammar
Addition of 'she'
In this sentence, is it necessary to have a 'she' after ritualistically? Does it read better with it included?
Thanks in advance,
Emma
She was weak and, almost ritualistically, she checked her body for signs of the virulent disease which had devastated the city.
Thanks in advance,
Emma
She was weak and, almost ritualistically, she checked her body for signs of the virulent disease which had devastated the city.
Top answer
sailsofoblivion Does it read better with it included? I prefer it with "she" included. Not to say your version isn't fine, but I would move the words around a little.
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sailsofoblivion Does it read better with it included?I prefer it with "she" included. Not to say your version isn't fine, but I would move the words around a little.
She was weak, and she checked her body, almost ritualistically, for signs of the virulent disease which had devastated the city.
The commas are optional.
CJ
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CalifJim sailsofoblivion Does it read better with it included?I prefer it with "she" included. Not to say your version isn't fine, but I would move the words around a little.She was weak, and she checked her body, almost ritualistically, for signs of the virulent disease which had devastated the city.The commas are optional.CJThank you
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Is it necessary? No. But it's good style.
The first "she" is part of a description - an adjective: She was weak.
The second is part of an action: She checked.
The first "she" is part of a description - an adjective: She was weak.
The second is part of an action: She checked.
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No need - the first pronoun governs both verbs:
She was weak and, almost ritualistically, checked her body for signs of the virulent disease which had devastated the city.
Either work - perhaps it's a matter of style, emphasis context, etc. (If there are lots of pronouns in surrounding paragraphs, for example repetition may sound clumsy.)
She was weak and, almost ritualistically, checked her body for signs of the virulent disease which had devastated the city.
Either work - perhaps it's a matter of style, emphasis context, etc. (If there are lots of pronouns in surrounding paragraphs, for example repetition may sound clumsy.)
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